I did this same thing today with my best friend from Junior High. It wasn’t an exercise in finding myself or a challenge to fulfill like how I presented it in the beginning of this post… it was simply two friends catching up. However, during this simple and not so unique (two suburban white girls met at a Starbucks to chat) experience two major things happened that have really changed and challenged my vision of myself and my future.
- I was crazy impressed. This person who I had known for what seems like my entire life is going out and accomplishing her dreams. Sure the dream has changed along the way (this is the same person who had once told me she was going to be an Olympic figure skater) but she has found things that she is passionate about and she’s going for it! In my own life, I looked at myself and wondered “In my own way, am I being as adventurous as she?” (To be honest, I cannot possibly compare because she is going to a developing country to do a research project and that is NOT something I could or would ever do… but what was MY version of going to Bangladesh or Guam or Myanmar?)
- A telltale sign of any unhappiness or insecurity was my embarrassment to talk about certain aspects of my life. Meeting with this friend was like meeting with a form of my childhood self, and the (very very FEW) things that I was embarrassed to talk about sent up red flags in my mind. If I wasn’t thrilled to share these with her, someone I have known for forever, why was I keeping them in my life? If I was happier talking about my best friend’s upcoming grad school plans or my boyfriends military career than I was talking about my own future, then what was I even DOING with my life?
Unless you are her, and you’re gorgeous, talented, tall, and intelligent. Then you ma'am are in fact unique and you should keep doing you and disregard this post.